Author Topic: you live where ?  (Read 2411 times)

Offline DRxBMW

  • ^ SuperNatural Motobricker
  • Posts: 902
you live where ?
« on: April 28, 2012, 10:16:52 PM »
You live WHERE?




    You live in any Southwest desert area (Arizona, etc.) when:

    1. You are willing to park 3 blocks away because you found shade.
    2. You can open and drive your car without touching the car door or the steering wheel.
    3. You've experienced condensation on your butt from the hot water in the toilet bowl.
    4. You would give anything to be able to splash cold water on your face.
    5. You can attend any function wearing shorts and a tank top.
    6. "Dress Code" is meaningless at all but maybe a few Catholic schools.
    7. You have over 100 recipes for Mexican food.
    8. The 4 seasons are: tolerable, hot, really hot, and ARE YOU KIDDING ME??!!
    9. You know that "dry heat" is comparable to what hits you in the face when you open your oven door.


    You live in Central Texas when:

    1. You have more cows than people in your County.
    2. Everyone has a pickup truck.  A few folks own cars.
    3. You know that a string is not a large thread, it is the pipe used on an oil drilling rig.
    4. When you see FM on a road sign, you know it is not about a radio station, but it means
        a Farm to Market road.
    5. You know the difference between a beer joint and a honky tonk.
    6. In the Summer when it is 93F, you pray that it will get 5 degrees HOTTER, so the humidity will
        go away.



    You Live in California when:

    1. You make over $250,000 and you still can't afford to buy a house.
    2. The high school quarterback calls a time-out to answer his cell phone.
    3. The fastest part of your commute is going down your driveway.
    4. You know how to eat an artichoke, cook a whole garlic bunch, and peel an avocado.
    5. When someone asks you how far something is, you tell them how long it will take to get there and not
         how many miles away it is.


    You live in New York City when:

    1. You say "the city" and expect everyone to know you mean Manhattan.
    2. You have never been to the Statue of Liberty or the Empire State Building.
    3. You can get into a four-hour argument about how to get from Columbus Circle to Battery Park, but
        can't find Wisconsin on a map.
    4. You think Central Park is "nature".
    5. You believe that being able to swear at people in their own language makes you multi-lingual.
    6. You've worn out a car horn.
    7. You think eye contact is an act of aggression.



    You Live in Maine when:

    1. You only have four spices: salt, pepper, ketchup, and Tabasco.
    2. Halloween costumes fit over parkas.
    3. You have more than one recipe for moose.
    4. Sexy lingerie is anything flannel with less than eight buttons.
    5. The four seasons are: winter, still winter, almost winter, and construction.



    You Live in the Deep South when:

    1. You can rent a movie and buy bait in the same store.
    2. "ya'll" is singular and "all ya'll" is plural.
    3. After five years you still hear, "You ain't from 'round here, are Ya?"
    4. "He needed killin' " is a valid defense.
    5. Everyone has 2 first names: Billy Bob, Jimmy Bob, Mary Sue, Betty Jean, Mary Beth, etc.



    You live in Colorado when:

    1. You carry your $3,000 mountain bike atop your $500 car.
    2. You tell your husband to pick up Granola on his way home and he stops at the day care center.
    3. A pass does not involve a football or dating.
    4. The top of your head is bald, but you still have a pony tail.



    You live in the Midwest when:

    1. You've never met any celebrities, but the mayor knows your name.
    2. Your idea of a traffic jam is ten cars waiting to pass a tractor.
    3. You have had to switch from "heat" to "A/C" on the same day.
    4. You end sentences with a preposition: "Where's my coat at?"
    5. When asked how your trip was to any exotic place, you say, "It was different!"

     

    You live in Florida when:

    1. You eat dinner at 3:15 in the afternoon.
    2. All purchases include a coupon of some kind -- even houses and cars.
    3. Everyone can recommend an excellent dermatologist.
    4. Road construction never ends anywhere in the state.
    5. Cars in front of you are often driven by headless people


    You live in Pennsylvania when:

    1. You have an uncontrollable urge to buy bread and milk when you hear the word "snow."
    2. You say the correct pronunciation LANG-kist-er instead of the mispronounced Lan-CAST-er, and
        LEB-en-in instead of the equally incorrect Leb-a-NON.
    3. You know the only way to make good fastnachts is to cook them in LARD.
    4. You live within two miles of a plant that makes potato chips,  corn chips, pretzels, candy, or
        ice cream, or that packages turkeys, beans, or bologna.
    5. You ask the waitress for "dippy eggs" for breakfast.
    6. You say things like, "Outen the lights," "I'm calling off today," and "They're calling for
        snow."
    7. You think the roads in any other state are smooth.
    8. Hearing horses clopping down a paved street doesn't bring you to the window to see what's
        going on outside.
    9. You prefer Hershey's Chocolate to Godiva.
    10. You consider Pittsburgh to be "out west," and you know the fastest way to Philly is the
         Turnpike.
    11. School closings due to snow take the radio stations a half an hour to finish, because just
         about every town has its own school district.
    12. You call sloppy joes "barbecue."
    13. You think Medium Rare equals Well Done.
    14. When it snows, they put cinders on the roads instead of sand.
    15. You can give directions to Intercourse with a straight face.


    You live at Lake Tahoe when:
    1. Your one and only suit and tie is in the furthest reaches of your closet, and you only wear
          it twice a year at The Fireman's Ball or the Soroptimist's Wine Tasting
    2. You KNOW that God made Tahoe first, and on the 7th day, just before resting, he made Los
          Angeles from left-overs.
    3. You have three types of snow shovels and are debating over whether you need a new snowblower.
    4. You own a Subaru 4wd.  So does your spouse.
    5. A TRACE of snow is anything up to 2" in a few hours; a DUMP is 2 FEET.
    6. You have been to the yearly Pray For Snow parties.
    7. You have three sets of downhill skis, poles, and boots
    8. You have ONE ski clothing outfit.
    9. You have a sidecar rig for Winter driving fun times.
    10. You have ALWAYS had at least ONE dog since moving to Tahoe.
    11. A LOCAL is someone who has been living here longer than 6 months.
Gary
Williamsport,Pa

1994 K 75 ABS "custom"
2005 F 650 GS

Rick G

  • Guest
Re: you live where ?
« Reply #1 on: April 28, 2012, 10:41:27 PM »
Love it
I think the mid west is the closest thing to Stanthorpe but I could add that you never say to any tradesman that there is no big hurry because you will never get it done.
I would say that the saying "Praise the lord and pass the neck polish" describes it well.

Tags: